No, rudeness is not a handicap

I have wanted to write this column for more than 20 years. When I woke this morning, I decided it was time. I’m on my soap box, so look out.

Ten years ago I was sitting in a speech pathology class at CMSU (now UCM). I was reading the forward of our class text, which contained the history of those with disabilities.

I cringed when I read the pages that reviewed the historical reports of those with mental limitations or physical disabilities. Traditionally, many of this population were used as court jesters. Some were thrown in rivers, left on a mountainside, incarcerated, or killed.

I had a hard time reading how those with disabilities were treated. But I had one question then, and I still do now.

How is it possible that everyone in the state of Missouri has a handicapped placard?

I am supposed to say “accessible” ... but Kelsey corrects me with, “No, Mom. It’s handicapped.”

Really, has anyone else noticed this, or is it just me?

I believe the hardest time for me was the day my daughter was in a full body cast, with bars between her legs. I pulled into a store parking lot where the handicapped spaces were taken. That was such a difficult time for Kelsey and our family.

Then there was the time when Kelsey was traveling with me and I observed a group of high school teenagers parking in handicapped. That day, it hit a nerve.

When I asked the students why they were parking their car in the handicapped section, they responded, “It’s grandma’s car, and it’s handicapped.” From my viewpoint of the car, the car did look somewhat disabled and Grandma might have been, too. But not one of those healthy baseball players, in team uniform, had a disability.

I’m sure most of you are aware that the rights for those with disabilities immediately followed the civil rights movement. Can anyone possibly pretend to be another race or color?

So what test can we give those who pretend to be disabled?

I understand that some states have moved to a handicapped placard application requiring three physician signatures. Can you imagine the time takes for a family and the physicians? It doesn’t for us because Kelsey already sees multiple doctors.

Perhaps, a person who parks in handicapped should show their Special Olympic or Quad Olympic participant card. Maybe those with vision impairment can show their special reading materials.

Possibly, those with a traumatic brain injury could show ... I don’t know, but something needs to be done.

Why would a person want to have disabilities?

My daughter has had 39 surgeries and nine disabilities, which make her challenges very hard.

I do recognize those who have disabilities that are not as obvious.

I phoned my sister Judy to ask her what her thoughts were. She said, and I quote, “Lacking common sense and consideration of others may be a handicap, but it doesn’t require a special parking space.”

May I give some suggestions?

If you do not have a disability, don’t park there.

If you are temporarily disabled, return the placard or throw it away, when you are un-disabled.

If you’re in a hurry, think of a friend or family member who had a recent surgery and needs that parking space.

Last, use consideration, thoughtfulness, and respect for those with disabilities.

Thank you.