We all agree that stealing, vandalism, and armed criminal action during any time of the year is just plain wrong. However, those bad acts turn to despicable during the holidays, a period of goodwill toward men and other sugary sweet ideas.

With this understanding, logic says mankind should be able to enact some sort of moratorium on thievery and such. Yup, I’m laughing too.

Yours truly stumbled onto this vacuum of reason on Christmas Eve. While at a party at a downtown Kansas City loft around midnight, there was a stirring on the roof of the building. Surely, it was Santa!

Turns out it was some fool tying a garden house to a rooftop air conditioning unit. Santa’s fallen elf then rappelled down to a landing and kicked in the window to the loft where – you guessed it – yours truly and seven other folks were enjoying some holiday cheer. The elf ran when he realized there were people in the loft who were suddenly armed with household items.

The elf scurried away before being caught by local police. That’s a good thing. Christmas isn’t about bloodshed and violent acts. Instead, the incident became hilarious fodder for the local TV news.

Surely that was just an isolated incident created by the confluence of greed, time and urbania. Seeking good news and holiday cheer, I turned to Eastern Jackson County’s daily news source. After all, crime and foolishness usually are limited to the borders of Kansas City, Mo.

As loyal readers, you no doubt noticed plenty of news in the newspaper to make you smile. For example, I despise canines yet I enjoyed the story of the lost dog recovered in Independence. (That’s a cold description, but my love for dogs has its limits.)

Underneath all the happy holiday coverage was a soft underbelly of petty crime and a major felony. You had robberies, vandalism and your usual police pursuits. Some clown was so desperate/greedy he robbed a bank inside a grocery store.

If you’re sitting at home reading these sad tales and enjoying adult beverage-infused hot cocoa, you’re left wondering why. More specifically, why can’t we all agree to put crime on hold for seven days and just enjoy the holidays?

Joking aside, the world is a dark place. Every day millions (conservatively) of horrible acts occur despite our best attempts to stifle them. Still, at least in America, it would seem possible and extremely desirable to put evil on hold for a moment and just live in the moment. We work hard to bring peace to other countries, so why can’t we have peace here?

Again, the idea of a moratorium on crime during the holidays seems laughable. One just wishes the idea wasn’t so funny.