Over in the sports department here at The Examiner, Dick Puhr pounds away on that typewriter of his and gives great coverage on local Eastern Jackson County athletes all year long.

Over in the sports department here at The Examiner, Dick Puhr pounds away on that typewriter of his and gives great coverage on local Eastern Jackson County athletes all year long.


Come the last week in December of every year, though, Puhr turns prophet and tells readers what he thinks will come to pass in the approaching year.


I’ve read it every year, and you know what – some have come true. Who would have thought that possible? Mr. Puhr doesn’t strike me as a Nostradamus, but then again maybe he, like most of us, can accidentally tap into some cosmic force and predict the future.


So here are my responses to Mr. Puhr’s prophetic predictions. No hard feelings, Mr. Puhr.


Read his column in the sports section.




Mr. Puhr has New England defeating New Orleans in the Super Bowl. Why doesn’t he have the Chiefs winning the Super Bowl? Ridiculous. Of course, I have the Pittsburgh Steelers winning over the Atlanta Falcons by four points, so I guess we’re even.

And then he has Alabama defeating Auburn in the BCS championship game. I don’t understand or care about college football, so I’ll give him this one.

Of course he has Kansas upsetting Duke in the NCAA basketball finals. If you know Mr. Puhr, you know Kansas.

 He has legendary Duke coach Mike Krzyzewski winning his 900th game – except against Kansas, I presume.

He has the Blue Springs girls basketball team advancing once again to the final four. I’ll take it further: Blue Springs Wildcats will win the state football championship.

Mr. Puhr expects it to rain the week of the Eastern Jackson County high school baseball tournaments and the weekend of the American Legion Memorial Day baseball tournaments. Do you know how many sporting events Mr. Puhr has been to? The man is plugged into the atmosphere, and he channels its rhythms every day. I hope you’re wrong here, Mr. Puhr, but you’re probably right.

He says snow will be on ground for the first day of spring sports practice on Feb. 28. What does the Farmer’s Almanac say?

Mr. Puhr claims that Tom Brady will win the NFL most valuable player award. Yuck. Well, I guess this makes sense: as of this week, Brady has thrown a little over 300 passes without an interception. And he took apart my Steelers. I think Michael Vick will get it – if, that is, the judges can withhold judgment on his past actions.

Daylight Savings Time begins March 13, he wrote. Uh, this one’s true regardless of what Mr. Puhr Prophet claims.

Oklahoma repeats as the Big 12 football champion. Probably, yeah. They practice on steers.

Tigers Woods wins another major. Even if he does, I’ll refuse to acknowledge it. And, sorry, golf isn’t a sport; it’s  an activity.

Blue Springs athletic director Tom Round sinks hole-in-one at the Country Club of Blue Springs, Mr. Puhr writes. See above about golf – but I’ll tip my hat if Round does what Mr. Puhr says he will.

The Royals lose 95 games, Puhr claims. Me? Without Zack, they’ll lose over 100.

Mr. Puhr will not appear on “American Idol” or “Dancing With the Stars,” but I will.

Mr. Puhr claims that Sarah Palin will not run for President in 2012. Palin, if she plays it right, will be the next leader of the United States of America. Voting in this country has become reactionary and a bit like “American Idol.” We vote for images, not reality.

The Dow hits 12,500, Puhr said. I hope so, but not likely.

The Miami Heat dethrone the Los Angeles Lakers in the NBA Finals. I’m from Akron and I know what kind of an ego King James has, so, no, they will not win it; James doesn’t understand the concept of team because he’s been spoiled all his life.

Missouri again qualifies for a bowl game. Of course they will. I’m sitting in an office full of Tiger fans; I’d be nuts to predict otherwise.

Kansas State basketball coach Frank Martin takes a class in anger management, he said. Hey, my last name is Martin and I don’t need no anger management!!! The guy is all right; he just has passion.

Terrell Owens and Randy Moss announce their retirements, Puhr predicts. They have both played for teams I despise so I’ve never followed them; I’d like to see that blowhard Ocho Cinco join them.

Mr. Puhr predicts that a talented pitching staff will lead the Philadelphia Phillies to the World Series title. I agree. Any team besides the Yankees is fine with me.

Truman wins several football games, Mr. Puhr believes. For the kids’ sake, I hope so.

Brett Favre is named the new coach of the Minnesota Vikings. Nah, he’ll become a quarterbacks coach for the Arizona Cardinals.

Zach Greinke wins 18 games with Milwaukee Brewers, Puhr believes. Not his first year, but maybe his second. Have you ever been to Milwaukee, though? Seriously.

Chiefs coach Todd Haley gets a hair cut. I’ll get one, too... eventually.

Kansas freshman running back and Blue Springs standout Darrian Miller rushes for 1,000 yards. Absolutely.

Not a single motorist will hit three consecutive green lights from 23rd Street to I-70 on Lee’s Summit Road, Mr. Puhr said. Well, sorry to break it to you, Mr. Puhr, but I’ve achieved this feat.

 


 


Mr. Puhr tells everyone that he hopes 2011 will be the best year of your life. I do too. I know mine will be.