Day 1 of curfew. 7.15 a.m. Sir raises his eyes to the heavens when I announce I’m going to take a shower so I can get to work – remotely of course. I leveled him with “the look” and suggested 30 days was a long, long time, and we’ve got another 29.8 to get through, so losing the attitude would be a positively spiffing idea.
I did find over the weekend a couple of Facebook/You Tube videos that I thought might be fun to try. The first one involved chocolate, so naturally I swooped on that knowing it would sweeten Sir’s “I’m a high risk” mood.
However, back to the video. Here we have a presumably well-known and fabulous chef showing how to make a delicious chocolate mousse using only chocolate and water. Having both of these ingredients, I was in.
Boil the water, pour over the chocolate and whisk, and voila, moussy chockie! How fabulous. I boiled, I poured, and I whisked And whisked. And whisked. Oh, and did I mention? I whisked. My right hand went numb, so I switched to my less naturally adept left, and I whisked, and splashed, and whisked some more.
Then take your bowl and place it in a bigger bowl full of ice. And guess what? Keep whisking. I did. Where the chef’s gloop thickened, mine remained stalwartly refusing to do so. After a good half hour of manually whisking, I brought out the big gun – the electric beaters. I beat, and beat, and looked up to see I had rendered the kitchen very close to a Jackson Pollock masterpiece. And guess what? The mixture thickened – on the splashed surfaces.
In the bowl? Not so much. So, having the Annie Dear Level of Patience, I gave up and just shoved it in the fridge.
Three days later I have a magnificent bowl of, you guessed it, chocolate water.
I’m happy converting metric measurements to these Draconian imperial ones, but I really take exception to faffing around with a certain quantity of milligrams when it comes to water. Milligrams measure solid things, milliliters measure liquid things, so it’s patently obvious I got the amount wrong. I will try again – maybe in May 2022, I haven’t quite made up my mind.
I have another video up my sleeve though. It involves a 3” x 2” strip of banana skin, the inside of which is liberally squirted with lemon juice, then daubed with a generous amount of honey. You proceed to rub it over your skin – in this case a hand – for 12 minutes, then let it sit for another 30. Rinse with cold water, and there you go! Your skin is then supposed to be soft as a baby’s bum and looking 50 years younger. I will add a little note here that the presenter had the skin of a 15-year old, and the comparison of post-banana versus pre-banana was infinitesimal at best.
I’ll let you know how it goes. If my chocolate water is anything to go by don’t hold your breath.
Stay safe, gentle readers. Let me know how you’re amusing yourselves.
Annie Dear lives in Lee’s Summit. Email her at firstname.lastname@example.org.