There's been a glitch in the system

Annie Dear
The Independent Aussie

In this day and age of technological wizardry, it’s a tad frightening to watch when things go ka-flooey.

Annie Dear

That awful sense of dread that overcomes you when the internet inexplicably goes out.  Your life flashes before your eyes and you wonder what on Earth you’re going to do with your time if it can’t be spent cruising the web.  You of course call your provider’s customer service department, to be met with the interminable “your call is very important to us” routine, until, having achieved the screaming Mimi part of your day, that you yell back at the phone “if it’s so bloody important why don’t you have more than one person answering the bloody phone?”

All in good time, your internet service is restored and all is again well with the world.

In our household, heaven forbid the times the TV goes out.  Remote controls are press-ganged into service, reset buttons are pushed, pulled, prodded and poked.  The stubborn little blue circle just sits there recalcitrantly spinning, until such time as Sir breaks down to call – you got it – customer service, who, once admitting a human does indeed hold that hallowed title, the little off-shore person has Sir performing naked calisthenics at the various boxes under the TV until service is indeed brought back from the dead.

Well, there are technical inconveniences, and then there are those of such gargantuan proportions you wonder at the enormity, not of the problem itself, but of the magic going on behind the scenes which caused the blow-up.

Take the recent spate of monumental woopsies at Chase Bank, for example. We have numbers of separate instances of late which rather give pause for thought.

Owing to a ‘technical glitch impacting a number of accounts’, a woman went to withdraw $20 from her account and was rather taken aback when she looked at the balance to see that close to a billion bucks had been deposited. 

Rather than saying, “well, whoopee, where’s the Ferrari and the $41 million dollar mansion in Lake Tahoe, I must contact Dianne Feinstein,” she intelligently knew the money wasn’t hers and tried womanfully to contact the bank to get this obvious error sorted out.

Naturally – oh sigh, oh, ho hum – she called the bank in order to get the money returned to its rightful place, but “hasn’t received any help”. Ah yes, customer service at its best.  But I’m sure her call was “important to us.”

Then down in Louisiana, a couple in Baton Rouge hit the “oh s--- lottery” when a cool fifty billion showed up in the wife’s account.

They naturally wondered “who’s going to be knocking on our door … because we don’t know anybody with that type of money to begin with/" Had George Soros become a benevolent benefactor overnight? 

This little hiccup took the bank four days to sort out.

To even things out, to be fair of course, several account holders got the thunderous shudders when they saw that their balances showed them to be $50 billion in debt. Just imagine the heart stopping moments that would cause?

Ah yes, the wonders of modern technology. Take me back to the time when, as I saw on a recent post, kids in my day read the backs of cereal boxes.

Annie Dear lives in Lee’s Summit. Email her at anniedear@icloud.com.