Getting my teeth cleaned doesn’t make me nervous. Having a toothache does.

Getting my teeth cleaned doesn’t make me nervous. Having a toothache does.

I had just been to my dentist for a cleaning a couple of months ago and he gave me a thumbs up. What I didn’t know is the fancy dancy X-ray and picture-taking machines won’t detect tooth roots that have gone plum crazy.

I couldn’t even tell which tooth was the culprit because the pain had spread to all the teeth on one side of my mouth, jaw and even into my ear.

 Dad suggested getting out the string and tying it to the doorknob, and that was even beginning to sound like a good idea.

My dentist is a “tooth guy” so he sent me to the “roots-gone-bad guy.” The words root and canal together sounded serious, but even so, I needed this pain to go away.

The “root canal people” said it would be a month before they could get me in. The pain in my voice must have sounded pretty pitiful because they worked over their lunch hour the next day to get me fixed up.

I wasn’t too worried about the pending root canal until I mentioned it to co-workers and they’d look horrified and back off like it was contagious or something.

I counted the hours until I could get cured, trying every home remedy I could think of. Nothing worked. I googled the Internet for relief from the wretched tooth, but wasn’t sure where I could find a guava tree leaf to chew on.

Whiskey was mentioned, but at that point I was afraid I would drink it instead of just swishing and that probably wouldn’t mix with the pain pills the dentist ordered for me.

I showed up at the “root” place 30 minutes early. Just sitting in the waiting area was a comfort. I was even looking forward to the dreaded numbing shots – anything to escape from the throbbing that was robbing my mind as it took over every thought.

If I heard it once, I heard it a hundred times “there’s nothing worse than a toothache” whenever anyone asked me what my problem was as I sat and stared at the computer screen for hours at a time. I was unable to move or think, all because of some stupid root. I must have been really cranky ‘cuz my boyfriend suggested I keep Peroxide in my mouth for 10 minutes at a time, every 30 minutes.

Either he thought it would kill the pain or just shut me up for a few minutes.

My thoughts became clear after my mouth was numb, as I waited for the canal work to begin. Questions began to flood my mind, as I still wasn’t certain which tooth it was and what were they going to do with my roots? Does the word canal mean deep drilling?

Two hours later and it was over. It wasn’t so bad, although I am brushing my teeth longer now to keep my canals clean and roots happy.

I’ve decided that all I really want for Christmas is to keep all my teeth.